Club Penguin Jokes

Starting during the 2009 Puffle Party, Club Penguin changes the jokes to something different during each party, that go along with the party’s theme. Here are all the jokes from each party:

Puffle Party 2009

UNKNOWN. If you have any of them please email them to us at cp.memories@yahoo.com

St. Patrick’s Day Party 2009

Why do frogs like St. Patrick’s Day so much?
Because they’re always wearing green!

What happens when a leprechaun falls in water?
He gets wet!

Why did the leprechaun cross the road?
To get the pot o’ gold in the other side!

What do you get if you cross poison ivy with a four-leaf clover?
A rash of good luck!

Penguin 1: Knock, knock!
Penguin 2: Who’s there?
Penguin 1: Irish.
Penguin 2: Irish who?
Penguin 1: Irish you a happy St. Patrick’s Day!

Why can’t you borrow money from a leprechaun?
Because they’re always a little short.

Why are leprechauns so hard to get along with?
Because they’re very short-tempered!

What would you get if you crossed a leprechaun with a frog?
A little green penguin with a croak of gold!

April Fools Day Party 2009

Was there any? We don’t know. Email us at cp.memories@yahoo.com if you do.

Medieval Party 2009

What’s a dragon’s favorite game?
Swallow the leader!

Where do kings and queens get crowned?
On the head!

What’s big and scary and drinks out of the wrong side of the glass?
A dragon trying to get rid of hiccups!

Why does history keep repeating itself?
Because we didn’t listen the first time!

What is a knight’s favorite game?
Knights and crosses!

What time is it when a knight looks at his belly button?
It is the middle of the night!

When is a piece of wood like a king?
When it’s a ruler!

Adventure Party 2009

What kind of tree do fingers grow on?
A palm tree!

What did the big flower say to a little flower?
How are you bud?

What did the tree wear to the pool?
Swimming trunks!

Where does a ship go when it’s sick?
To the Dock!

How do trees count?
One two tree!

What does a shark eat for dinner?
Fish and ships!

What is the best day to go to the beach?
Sunday!!

How do trees get on the internet?
The log in!

Why did the penguin cross the beach?
To get to the other tide!

Why do fish swim in salt water?
Because pepper makes them sneeze!

Music Jam 2009

What did the dentist give Penguin Band?
A tuba tooth paste!

How does a penguin fix a broken guitar?
Igloos it together!

Whats a penguins favorite type of music?
Flip Hop!

Why does the sea make a good audience?
Its always waving!

Why are penguins the best dancers?
Because they have some cool moves!

How did Aunt Arctic make a band stand?
She took away their chairs!

Why wouldn’t the clam let the penguin join his band?
Because he was a little shell fish

Whats a mummys favorite type of music?
Wrap!

Why does Frank prefer guitars over fish?
Because you can’t tuna fish!

What makes music on your head?
A head band!

Festival of Flight 2009

What holds up the sun in the sky?
Sun Beams!

Why is it so windy at sporting events?
Because of all the fans!

Why does a seagull fly over the sea?
Because if it flew over the bay it would be a bagel!

What invention lets you see through walls?
Windows!

Why are pilots so successful?
Because they go up in the world!

How do you find out what the weather is like on the top of a mountain?
You climate!

What should you say to your buddies before they play Jetpack Adventure?
Beak careful out there!

What’s the richest type of air?
A billion air!

How do you find out the weather when you are on holiday?
You go outside and look up!

Fall Fair 2009

UNKNOWN. If you have any of them please email them to us at cp.memories@yahoo.com

Halloween Party 2009

UNKNOWN. If you have any of them please email them to us at cp.memories@yahoo.com

Great Snow Maze 2009

Where do you find wild Yetis?
It depends where you left them!

What do you call a Yeti in a Snow Maze?
Lost!

What’s Black and White and Red all Over?
An embarassed penguin!

How does a penguin make ice cream?
With its flippers!

What steps should you take if you see a Yeti?
Very large ones!

What do you call a gigantic Yeti?
Nothing, you just run away!

What kind of ball doesn’t bounce?
A snowball!

What do Yetis eat for dinner?
Ice-burgers!

Holiday Party 2009

What is the first thing elves learn in school?
The elf-abet!

Knock, knock
Who’s there?
Holly
Holly Who?
Holly-days are here again!

Knock, knock
Who’s there?
Mary
Mary Who?
Mary Christmas!

What do reindeer hang on their christmas trees?
Horn-amanets!

What happens if you eat Christmas Decorations?
You get tinsel-itus!

How long should a reindeer’s legs be?
Long enough to reach the ground.

What hides in a bakery at Christmas?
A mince spy!

What did one snowman say to another?
Do you smell carrots?

What goes oh oh oh?
Santa walking backwards

What do you get if you cross a snowman and a shark?
Frost bite!

Puffle Party 2010

What do you get when you mix a puffle and chocolate?
Truffles!

What do you call a puffle in the desert?
Lost!

How do puffles like their dinner?
O Berry well!

What pet makes the loudest noise?
A trum-pet!

What is the coldest part of the Antarctic?
A penguin’s flippers!

What’s cute and fluffy and jumps a lot?
A puffle with hiccups!

What did the banana say when the puffle stepped on it?
Nothing! Bananas don’t talk!

Why did the puffle cross the playground?
To get to the other slide!

What do you call a puffle with a cold?
A snuffle!

What kind of fish goes well with peanut butter?
Jellyfish!

Penguin Play Awards

Why did the squid cross the ocean?
To get to the other tide!

What kind of fish walks down the red carpet?
A starfish!

Why didn’t the hotdog star in the play?
Because the rolls weren’t good enough!

Where do penguins go swimming?
At the south pool!

What kind of ship never sinks?
Friend-ship!

Why does the sea make a good audience?
It’s always waving!

Why don’t penguins tell jokes about popcorn?
Because they’re so corny!

Why are penguins the best dancers?
Because they have some cool moves!

April Fools Day Party 2010

What is a bird’s favorite cookie?
Chocolate chirp!

What do you call a polar bear in the rain?
A drizzly bear!

How do trees get on the computer?
They log in!

What do you calla lazy kangaroo?
A pouch potato!

How do you warm up a cold wall?
You give it a second coat!

What bird tells the best jokes?
A comedi-hen!

Why do A’s look like flowers?
Because B’s come after them!

Where do books sleep?
Under their covers!

Why aren’t fish good tennis players?
They don’t like getting close to the net!

What do you call a dinosaur that’s never late?
A pronto-saurus!

Earth Day Party 2010

What kind of bean never grows in a garden?
A jelly bean!

What do you get if you cross a shark with a flower?
I don’t know, but I’m not going to smell it!

What’s black and yellow and goes zzub zzub zzub?
A bee flying backwards!

What’s the worst vegetable to have on a boat?
A leek!

How does a tree count?
One, two tree!

Why do bees hum?
Because they don’t know the words!

Why do potatoes make great secret agents?
Because they keep their eyes peeled!

Why was the mushroom invited to the party?
Because he was a fun-gi to be with!

Why is the letter A like a flower?
Because a B comes after it

Why is a garden like a story?
Because they have plots!

How do trees get on the internet?
They just log in!

Why shouldn’t you tell secrets in a garden? Because corn has ears…potatoes have eyes… and the beanstalk!

Medieval Party 2010

Why did the princess go to the print shop?
To find her Prints Charming!

Why did the king to do the dentist?
To get his teeth crowned!

When do castles and kingdoms sleep?
Why it’s knight-time!

What’s a knight’s favorite fish?
A swordfish!

Why did the king draw straight lines?
Because he was a ruler!

Why does history keep repeating itself?
Because we didn’t listen the first time!

What’s big and scary and wears sunglasses?
A dragon on holiday!

What time is it when a knight looks at his belly button?
The middle of the knight!

Island Adventure Party 2010

What did the sea say to the mermaid?
Nothing, it just waved!

What do you call two octopuses that look alike?
I-tentacle twins!

Why do seagulls live by the sea?
Because if they lived by the bay…they would be called bagels!

Why did the mermaid swim across the ocean?
To get to the other tide!

What does a sea monster eat for dinner?
Fish and ships!

Why couldn’t the sailors play cards?
Because the captain was standing on the deck!

Where does a boat go when it’s sick?
To the dock!

Where do you find cold pirates?
In the aaaaaarrrrctic!

What is a pirate’s favorite fish?
A swordfish!

Why did the captain grab a bar of soap when his ship sank?
To wash himself ashore!

What do pirates say when they’re scared?
Quiver me timbers!

Music Jam 2010

What type of music are balloons scared of?
Pop music!

What is the difference between a fish and a piano?
You can’t tuna fish!

How do you make a bandstand?
You take away their chairs!

What makes music on your head?
A head-band!

What is the most musical bone?
The trom-bone!

How do you clean a messy tuba?
With a tuba toothpaste!

What food is best for making music?
A good beet!

How is playing Bean Counters like making music?
If you don’t C-sharp you’re gonna B-flat!

Where’s the best place to play an elastic guitar?
In a rubber band!

What is the loudest pet?
The trum-pet!

Mountain Expedition Party 2010

Where do snowmen keep their money?
In snow banks!

What music do mountains like most?
Rock!

Where do polar bears vote?
The North Poll!

What books do climbers like best?
Cliff-hangers!

Why are mountains so good at hide and seek?
They peak!

What is a volcano?
A mountain with hiccups!

What do scared pebbles want most?
To become a little boulder!

What do mountains say when they’re not joking?
Snowjoke!

What did the mountain climber name their puffle?
Cliff!

Fall Fair 2010

Why did the cow cross the road?
Because it wanted to go to the moo-vies!

What did the banana say…when the puffle stepped on it?
Nothing! Bananas don’t talk!

Why don’t penguins tell jokes about popcorn?
Because they’re so corny!

What is the coldest part of the Antarctic?
A penguins flippers!

What stays in the corner but travels all over?
A stamp!

What did the paper say to the pencil?
Write on!

What’s black and white and jumps a lot?
A penguin with hiccups!

What did the teddy bear say after eating lunch?
I’m stuffed!

What dance can you do on a trampoline?
Hip hop!

Halloween Party 2010

Where do ghosts buy their food?
At the ghost-ery store!

Why was the mummy so tense?
He was all wound up!

What monster likes to dance the most?
The Boogieman!

What’s a ghost’s favorite treat?
Ice-scream!

What do ghosts wear to parties?
A boo-tie!

What do ghosts have in their coffee?
Scream and sugar!

What kind of mistakes do ghosts make?
Boo boos!

What do birds give out on Halloween?
Tweets!

What do monsters use in their hair?
Scare spray!

Card-Jitsu Water Jokes

What do sea monsters eat?
Fish and ships!

What goes up when rain comes down?
Umbrellas!

What is the best kind of water to dance on?
Tap water!

Why is the river so rich?
Because it has two banks!

What gets wetter the more it dries?
A towel!

What lies at the bottom of the sea and shakes?
A nervous wreck!

Where does a boat go when it’s sick?
To the dock!

Why did the whale swim across the ocean?
To get to the other tide!

What did the sea say to the iceberg?
Nothing, it just waved!

Holiday Party 2010

How do snowmen greet each other?
Ice to meet you!

What’s the best present to get?
A broken drum. You can’t beat it!

What is green, white, and red all over?
A sunburnt elf!

Where do snowmen go to dance?
The snow ball!

Which reindeer needs to mind his manners the most?
Rude-olph!

What do you tell a stressed-out snowman?
Chill out!

Why did Santa get a fine on Christmas eve?
He left his sled in the Snow Parking Zone!

How do fish celebrate the holidays?
They hang REEFS on their doors?

Whats white and goes up?
A confused snowflake!

Wilderness Expedition 2011

Why are igloos round?
So that puffles can’t hide in the corners!

What can jump higher than a mountain?
Everything because mountains can’t jump!

What’s black and white…and black and white…and black and white?
A penguin rolling down a hill!

Which is the laziest mountain?
Mount Ever-rest!

What do you call a penguin in the desert?
Lost!

What do scared pebbles want the most?
To become a little boulder!

How do you get out of the Forest?
Make like a tree and leaf!

What did the mountain climber name their puffle?
Cliff!

What books do climbers like best?
Cliff-hangers!

Puffle Party 2011

What do you call a puffle in the desert?
Lost!

What is the coldest part of the Antarctic?
A penguins flippers!

How do puffles like their dinner?
O Berry well!

What pet makes the loudest noise?
A trum-pet!

What do you get when you mix a puffle and chocolate?
Truffles!

What do you call a puffle with a cold?
A snuffle!

What kind of fish goes well with peanut butter?
Jellyfish!

What’s cute and fluffy and jumps a lot?
A puffle with hiccups!

Why did the puffle cross the playground?
To get to the other slide!

What did the banana say when the puffle stepped on it?
Nothing! Bananas don’t talk!

April Fools Day 2011

Where does a boat go when it’s sick?
To the dock!

How does a penguin make ice cream?
With its flippers!

Why do some birds fly south for the winter?
Because it’s too far to walk!

How do you warm up a cold wall?
You give it a second coat!

What bird tells the best jokes?
A comedi-hen!

What does a banana say when you stop on it?
Nothing! Bananas don’t talk!

What kind of fish do penguins catch at night?
Starfish!

Why don’t penguins tell jokes about popcorn?
Because they’re so corny!

What kind of fish goes well with peanut butter?
Jellyfish!

Earth Day Party 2011

How do trees get onto the internet?
They just log in!

Why do potatoes make great secret agents?
Because they keep their eyes peeled!

What do you get if you cross a shark with a flower?
I don’t know, but I’m not going to smell it!

What’s black and yellow and goes zzub zzub zubb?
A bee flying backwards!

Why is a garden like a story?
Because they both have plots!

What’s the worst vegetable to have on a boat?
A leek!

How does a tree count?
One, two tree!

Why do bees hum?
BEcause they don’t know the words!

What kind of bean never grows in a garden?
A jelly bean!

Why is the letter A like a flower?
Because a B comes after it!

Why shouldn’t you tell secrets in a garden?
Because corns have ears…potatoes have eyes…and the beanstalk!

Why was the mushroom invited to the party?
Because he was a fun-gi to be with!

Medieval Party 2011

How can you tell if there’s a dragon in your closet?
Because the door won’t close!

What do you do with a blue dragon?
Try to cheer her up!

What time is it when a knight looks at his belly button?
The middle of the knight!

Why do dragons sleep during the day?
So they can fight knights!

Why was the queen’s room flooded?
Because she ‘reigned’ for many years!

What do you call a knight who’s afraid to joust?
Sir Render!

What’s big and scary and wears sunglasses?
A dragon on holiday!

What does Sir Lancelot use to see in the dark?
His knight-light!

Music Jam 2011

How do you clean a messy tuba?
With a tuba toothpaste!

How do you make a bandstand?
You take away their chairs!

What type of music are ballons scared of?
Pop music!

What is the loudest pet?
The trum-pet!

What food is best for making music?
A good beet!

What makes music on your head?
A head-band!

How is playing Bean Counters like making music?
If you don’t C-sharp you’re gonna B-flat!

What is the difference between a fish and a piano?
You can’t tuna-fish!

What is the most musical bone?
The trom-bone!

Where’s the best place to play an eleastic guitar?
In a rubber band!

Adventure Party 2011

What do pirates say when they’re scared?
Quiver me timbers!

Where does a boat go when it’s sick?
To the dock!

What does a sea monster eat for dinner?
Fish and ships!

Why did the captain grab a bar of soap when his ship sank?
To help him wash ashore!

Why couldn’t the sailors play cards?
Because the captain was standing on the deck!

Why did the mermaid swim across the ocean?
To get to the other tide!

What is a pirate’s favorite fish?
A goldfish!

Why do seagulls live by the sea?
Because if they lived by the bay… …they would be called bagels!

What do you call two octopuses that look alike?
I-tentacle twins!

Where do you find cold pirates?
In the aaaaaarrrrctic!

What did the sea say to the mermaid?
Nothing, it just waved!

Great Snow Race 2011

What’s a polar bear’s favorite food?
Brr-grrs!

What’s white and goes up?
A confused snowflake!

What did the mountain climber name their puffle?
Cliff!

What do mountains say when they’re not joking?
Snow joke!

Why are mountains so good at hide and seek?
They peak!

What books do climbers like best?
Cliff-hangers!

Where do polar bears vote?
The North Poll!

What music do mountains like most?
Rock!

Where do snowmen keep their money?
In snow banks!

Where do you find cold pirates?
In the aaaaaarrrrctic!

What falls but doesn’t get hurt?
Snow!

The Fair 2011

Why couldn’t the pirate play cards?
Because he was standing on the deck!

Why are cars lazy?
Because their wheels are always tired!

What’s black and white and jumps a lot?
A penguin with hiccups!

What’s a cat’s favorite summer treat?
A mice cream cone!

Want to hear a good joke about pizza?
Nevermind, it’s too cheesy!

Why did the clown go to the doctor?
He was feeling funny!

Why don’t penguins tell jokes about popcorn?
Because they’re so corny!

What did the banana say…when the puffle stepped on it?
Nothing! Bananas don’t talk!

Why did the cow cross the road?
Because it wanted to go to the moo-vies!

Halloween Party 2011

What do monsters use in their hair?
Scare spray!

What do birds give out on Halloween?
Tweets!

What kind of mistakes do ghosts make?
Boo boos!

What do ghosts have in their coffee?
Scream and sugar!

What do ghosts wear to parties?
A boo-tie!

What’s a ghost’s favorite treat?
Ice-scream!

What monster likes to dance the most?
The Boogieman!

Why was the mummy so tense?
He was all wound up!

Where do ghosts buy their food?
At the ghost-ery store!

Card-Jitsu Party 2011

What did the ninja say when he saw a volcano?
Holy smoke

Why did Sensei jump in the lake?
Because he wanted to test the waters!

What goes up when rain comes down?
Umbrellas!

What part of Sensei disappears when he stands up?
His lap!

What’s as big as Sensei but doesn’t weigh anything?
His shadow!

What did the Fire Ninja say to the volcano?
Have a lava-ly day!

What is the best kind of water to dance on?
Tap water!

Why did the ninja pour water over Sensei?
He wanted to make a big splash!

Holiday Party 2011

What goes oh oh oh?
Santa walking backwards!

What do elves learn in school?
The elf-abet!

What do you call a giant yeti?
Nothing, you just run away!

What hides in a bakery at Christmas?
A mince spy!

What carol do monkeys sing?
Jungle Bells!

Why does Santa have three gardens?
So he can ho ho ho!

What’s white and goes up?
A confused snowflake!

What did one snowman say to the other?
Do you smell carrots?

Underwater Expedition 2012

What did the crab say to the fish?
Click click clickety click
Get it?

What did the fish say to the crab?
Long tide, no sea!

What do fish get when they graduate school?
A deep-loma!

Why are fish so smart?
They live in schools!

What’s the best way to catch a fish?
Have someone throw it to you!

What fish is most valuable?
A goldfish!

Why do seagulls live by the sea?
If they lived by the bay, they’d be bagels!

Why did the shark cross the ocean?
To get to the other tide!

Rockhopper’s Quest 2012

What is a pirates favorite food?
BARRRRbeque!

How much does it cost for a pirate to get earrings?
A buck-an-ear!

What has eight legs and eight eyes?
Eight pirates!

Why are pirates called pirates?
They just ARRRR!

What does a backwards pirate say?
RRRRRA!

What do pirates wear when it’s cold?
They wear pARRkas!

What do pirates say when their ships get stuck in ice?
Shiver me timbers!

Why does it take pirates so long to learn the alphabet?
Because they spend years at C!

Puffle Party 2012

Why did the penguin put oil on the puffle?
It was squeaking!

What do you call a puffle with a cold?
A snuffle!

Why did the puffle cross the playground?
To get to the other slide!

What’s cute and fluffy and jumps a lot?
A puffle with hiccups!

What do you call a puffle in space?
Lost!

How do puffles like their dinner?
O Berry well!

What kind of fish goes well with peanut butter?
Jellyfish!

What is the coldest part of the Antarctic?
A penguin’s flippers!

What pet makes the loudest noise?
A trum-pet!

How do puffles eat spaghetti?
With their mouths!

April Fools Day Party 2012

Where does a boat go when it’s sick?
To the dock!

Why don’t penguins tell jokes about popcorn?
Because they’re so corny!

What kind of fish do penguins catch at night?
Starfish!

Why do some birds fly south for the winter?
Because it’s too far to walk!

How do you warm up a cold wall?
You give it a second coat!

What bird tells the best jokes?
A comedi-hen!

What kind of fish goes well with peanut butter?
Jellyfish!

What does a banana say when you step on it?
Nothing! Bananas don’t talk!

How does a penguin make ice cream?
With its flippers!

Earth Day Party 2012

What do you call an elephant in a phone box?
Stuck!

What is the strongest animal?
A snail. He carries his house on his back!

How does a porcupine play leap-frog?
Very carefully!

What do you give an elephant with big feet?
Plenty of room!

What’s the difference between a wet day and a lion with a splinter?
One pours with rain, the other roars with pain!

What happens when a frog’s car breaks down?
He gets toad away!

What time is it when an polar bear sits on your igloo?
Time to get a new igloo!

What do call a bear with no ears?
B!

What do you get if you cross a fish with an elephant?
Swimming trunks!

Medieval Party 2012

What’s scary and wears sunglasses?
A dragon on holiday!

How can you tell if there’s a dragon in your closet?
Because the door won’t close!

What do you do with a blue dragon?
Try to cheer her up!

Why do dragons sleep during the day?
So they can fight knights!

Why was the queen’s room flooded?
Because she ‘reigned’ for many years!

What time is it when a knight looks at his belly button?
The middle of the knight!

What do you call a knight who’s afraid to joust?
Sir Render!

What does Sir Lancelot use to see in the dark?
His knight-light!

Marvel Superhero Takeover 2012

What is a Super Hero’s favorite meal?
A hero sandwich!

What did Squidzoid drive to the bank?
An ARMored car!

Why did the super villain have no friends?
Even his breath was bad!

What did the Super Hero say about the falling airplane?
Excuse me, I have to catch a flight!

What did Squidzoid do when he got to the bank?
ARMED robbery!

What do you call a hero with soup on his cape?
A soup-er hero!

How many villains does it take to change a lightbulb?
None! They like the dark!

What is a super villain’s favorite part of a joke?
The ‘punch’ line!

What’s cute and fluffy and jumps a lot?
A puffle with hiccups!

What did the banana say when the puffle stepped on it?
Nothing! Bananas don’t talk!

Ultimate Jam 2012

Why couldn’t the musician play the piano?
She lost her keys!

I make music on your head. What am I?
A head band!

What’s the most musical bone?
The Trom-bone!

What dance can you do on a trampoline?
Hip-hop!

Why don’t dogs dance very well?
They have two left feet!

Where do computers like to dance?
At the disk-o!

Where do carnivores like to dance?
At the meat ball!

Why did the car go to the Dance Club?
To brake dance!

Adventure Party 2012: Temple of Fruit

Why did the apple stop in the middle of the road?
It ran out of juice!

How do you fix a broken Tomato?
Tomato paste!

How do you fix a cracked pumpkin?
With a pumpkin patch!

Why were the apple and the orange all alone?
Because the banana split!

What happens to grapes when you step on them?
They wine!

What kind of shoes are made from banana peels?
Slippers!

What do bananas do when they first meet?
A banana shake!

Why aren’t bananas ever lonely?
They come in bunches!

What kind of apple is always grouchy?
A crab apple!

The Fair 2012

Why couldn’t the pirate play cards?
Because he was standing on the deck!

Why are cars lazy?
Because their wheels are always tired!

What’s black and white and jumps a lot?
A penguin with hiccups!

What’s a cat’s favorite summer treat?
A mice cream cone!

Want to hear a good joke about pizza?
Nevermind, it’s too cheesy!

Why did the clown go to the doctor?
He was feeling funny!

Why don’t penguins tell jokes about popcorn?
Because they’re so corny!

What did the banana say…
…when the puffle stepped on it?

Nothing! Bananas don’t talk!

Why did the cow cross the road?
Because it wanted to go to the moo-vies!

Halloween Party 2012

What do monsters use in their hair?
Scare spray!

What do birds give out on Halloween?
Tweets!

What kind of mistakes do ghosts make?
Boo boos!

What do ghosts have in their coffee?
Scream and sugar!

What do ghosts wear to parties?
A boo-tie!

What’s a ghost’s favorite treat?
Ice-scream!

What monster likes to dance the most?
The Boogieman!

Why was the mummy so tense?
He was all wound up!

Where do ghosts buy their food?
At the ghost-ery store!

Operation Blackout

What’s the difference between a polar bear and a mailbox?
If you don’t know, you’re not very observant

Why are polar bears big and furry?
If they were small and smooth, they’d be snowballs

What do you call a polar bear with skates?
A roller bear

How do you stop a polar bear from charging?
Ask politely

How does a polar bear stop a DVD?
He presses the pause button

What do you get if you cross a polar bear and some seaweed
A polar bear!

Why do polar bears have fur coats?
Because Hawaiian shirts are too cold

What did the polar bear eat after the dentist fixed his teeth?
A nice salad

Why shouldn’t you take a polar bear to the zoo?
Because they’d rather go to the movies

Holiday Party 2012

What goes oh oh oh?
Santa walking backwards!

What do elves learn in school?
The elf-abet!

What do you call a giant yeti?
Nothing, you just run away!

What hides in a bakery at Christmas?
A mince spy!

What carol do monkeys sing?
Jungle Bells!

Why does Santa have three gardens?
So he can ho ho ho!

What’s white and goes up?
A confused snowflake!

What did one snowman say to the other?
Do you smell carrots?

Prehistoric Party 2013

What do you call a sleeping dinosaur?
A dino snore!

What do you call a dinosaur that never gives up?
A Try Try Try ceratops!

What makes more noise than a T Rex?
Two T Rexes!

What did the T Rex get after falling down?
Dino sore!

What’s the best way to talk to a T Rex?
From a distance!

What does a Triceratops sit on?
Its Tricera bottom!

What do you call a blind dinosaur?
A Doyouthinkhesaurus!

What do you call a fossil that doesn’t want to work?
Lazy bones!

Hollywood Party 2013

How can you tell which fly is an actor?
It’s the one on the screen!

Where did the cows go on a Saturday night?
The mooovies!

Where do mermaids go to see movies?
At the dive-in!

Why are movie stars so cool?
They have a lot of fans!

What’s a rabbit’s favorite dance style?
Hip-Hop!

What do you get if you cross a refrigerator with a stereo?
Cool music!

Why didn’t the hot dog star in any movies?
He wasn’t getting good rolls!

Why did the fish go to Hollywood?
He wanted to be a starfish!

Puffle Party 2013

What did the artist name his puffle?
Drew!

Why did the penguin put oil on the puffle?
It was squeaking!

What do you call a puffle with a cold?
A snuffle!

Why did the puffle cross the playground?
To get to the other slide!

What’s cute and fluffy and jumps a lot?
A puffle with hiccups!

What do you call a puffle in space?
Lost!

How do puffles like their dinner?
O Berry well!

What pet makes the loudest noise?
A trum-pet!

Marvel Superhero Takeover 2013

What is a super hero’s favorite drink?
Fruit punch!

What is a super hero’s favorite meal?
A hero sandwich

Why did the super villain have no friends?
Even his breath was bad!

What did the super hero say about the falling airplane?
Excuse me, I have to catch a flight!

What do you call a hero with soup on his cape?
A soup-er hero!

How many villains does it take to change a light bulb?
None! They like the dark!

What is a super villain’s favorite part of a joke?
The ‘punch’ line!

Card-Jitsu Party 2013

If the sun shines while it’s snowing, what should you look for?
Snowbows!

Why is the slippery ice like music?
If you don’t C sharp – you’ll B flat!

Where do snowmen keep their money?
In the snowbank!

Why did Sensei jump into the lake?
Because he wanted to test the waters!

How do snowmen greet each other?
Ice to meet you!

What’s as big as Sensei but doesn’t weigh anything?
His shadow!

What did the Fire Ninja say to the volcano?
Have a lova-ly day!

What is the best kind of water to dance on?
Tap water!

Why did the ninja pour water over Sensei?
He wanted to make a big plash!

Monsters University Takeover 2013

Why did the clock in the cafeteria always run slow?
Every lunch it went back four seconds!

What flies around the classroom at night?
The alpha-BAT!

What do you say to a three-headed monster?
Hello hello hello!

What did the flower get in school?
All bees!

Why are fish so smart?
They’re always in schools!

What subject do snakes like?
Hisstory!

How does a penguin go to school?
On an icicle!

What do sea monsters eat?
Fish and ships!

What subject do trees like?
Geome-tree!

Star Wars Takeover 2013

What do planets like to read?
Comet books!

Where does Luke Skywalker buy his Lightsaber?
Darth Mall!

What do you call a Sith that works at a restaurant?
Darth Waiter!

Why didn’t the Droid like the cafe on the asteroid?
There was no atmosphere!

Where did the X-wing fighter park his ship?
A parking meteor!

How did the penguin get to Endor?
Ewoked over!

Why do doctors make the best Jedi?
Because a Jedi must have patience!

What’s a Jedi’s favorite toy?
A yo-yoda!

Why did the angry Jedi cross the road?
To get to the Dark Side.

Teen Beach Movie Summer Jam 2013

What did the pig say at the beach?
I’m bakin’!

How do fish call each other?
On their shell phones!

How do teddy bears keep cool in the summer?
Bear Conditioning!

What do you call a dog on the beach?
A hot dog!

How do you cut a wave in half?
Use a sea saw!

What washes up on small beaches?
Micro-waves!

What did the TV do at the beach?
Channel Surf!

What is the best day to go to the beach?
Sunday!

How do you say hi to a surfer?
Just wave!

What do you call a fish with no eyes?
FSH

Why do penguins eat fish?
Because donuts get soggy before they can catch them

What lies at the bottom of the sea and shakes?
A nervous wreck!

Why is it so easy to weigh fish?
They have their own scales

What do Penguins sing on a birthday?
Freeze a jolly good fellow

How do you communicate with a fish?
You drop him a line

What is a penguin’s favourite party game?
Sardines

Why are igloos round?
So that penguins can’t hide in the corners

How does a penguin build its house?
Igloos it together

Why are penguins so popular on the Internet?
Because they have Web feet!

What do you call a penguin in the desert?
Lost

What’s black and white and goes round and round?
A penguin in a revolving door

What bird can write underwater?
A ball point PENguin!

What’s the best way to catch a fish?
Have someone throw it at you

Medieval Party 2013

What do frog princes like to eat with their hamburgers?
French flies!

When is a piece of wood like a king?
When it’s a ruler!

What has six legs, four ears…
…and a shining suit of armor?
A prince on horseback!

How can you tell if there’s a dragon in your closet?
Because the door won’t close!

Why was the queen’s room flooded?
Because she reigned for many years!

What was Camelot?
A place where people parked their camels!

What do you call a mosquito in a tin suit?
A bite in shining armor!

How do you send a message in the forest?
By moss code!

Why were they called the dark ages?
Because there were so many knights!

What do you call a fish with no eyes?
FSH

Why do penguins eat fish?
Because donuts get soggy before they can catch them

What lies at the bottom of the sea and shakes?
A nervous wreck!

Why is it so easy to weigh fish?
They have their own scales

What do Penguins sing on a birthday?
Freeze a jolly good fellow

How do you communicate with a fish?
You drop him a line

What is a penguin’s favourite party game?
Sardines

Why are igloos round?
So that penguins can’t hide in the corners

How does a penguin build its house?
Igloos it together

Why are penguins so popular on the Internet?
Because they have Web feet!

What do you call a penguin in the desert?
Lost

What’s black and white and goes round and round?
A penguin in a revolving door

What bird can write underwater?
A ball point PENguin!

What’s the best way to catch a fish?
Have someone throw it at you


20 thoughts on “Club Penguin Jokes

  1. Here is one

    Knock Knock,

    Who’s There

    Avenue

    Avenue who

    Avenue you got a door bell!!

    W
    A
    D
    D
    L
    E

    O
    N
    !
    !

  2. ITALY GOT HUNGRY
    ATE TURKEY
    SLIPPED ON GREECE
    BROKE CHINA
    WENT SHOPPING IN ICELAND
    AND GOT EATEN BY WALES

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